No one should tell you how to live your life. And no one should make you feel like you need to change the way you are living your life.
Most of people’s unhappiness is fueled by the feeling that they should live or be different than they are. That they should have a better career, earn more, live healthier, weigh less, be prettier, have more muscles, run a marathon, have a happy family, be in a fulfilling relationship, never be stressed, deal well with grief, not have any mental health issues – I could go on for days. No one can be all of that. And here’s another thing, no one can be you and you can be no one else. You will always be best at being yourself, you will always be second best at being someone else.
So why don’t we spend more time figuring out how we want to live our only lives and how our uniqueness in comprised? We don’t want to be isolated, and the fear that if we go down this path of uniqueness we will find a path of isolation and solitude. Which, I am not going to lie, is there. Finding your own path is uncomfortable and lonely. But it doesn’t mean that you are alone. There are tribes of people on the same journey as you and even more people that would be inspired by your exploration. So why aren’t we all embracing our uniqueness and living life according to our own terms if its not isolating and has no damage?
Some of us are scared there is nothing there. There is an eternal fear of mankind that if we look inward we might not like what we see or even worse, there is nothing there. If you do find that to be the case, I advise you not to fear. It will come with time. It just means you haven’t nourished this area. Like a seed, it is planted just wasn’t given light or water to grow. Everyone is born with a personality and preferences. Otherwise we would all like the same food, the same music, approach life the same way. You have a seed. All human beings do. Somewhere in you there is a you. You just need to shine a light on it.
Becoming more of yourself does not mean you are becoming less of who you are currently. It just means having a more fulfilled life. I’m not a big fan or an advocate of dropping everything going on a “eat pray love” journey or quitting to go work for doctor’s without borders (although they are a great charity from what I have been told). Life is lived in the simplest moments. As it is rare, it’s even more important you figure out how to live it based on your criteria and your standards.