Its ok to want to be the best version of yourself. It’s a noble goal to have in the short time you find yourself on this earth. Yet there is a flip side to this – when will you have achieved this goal? When do you know that you are now the best version of yourself and that there is nothing left to work on?
I don’t think you can ever get to an end state unless you have a very specific definition of what the best version of your self is (“120 pounts, can write 5 sentences in spanish, works 8-5 at the post office”). Which, makes your life easier and you are sure to find something few people ever manage to – bliss. Pure bliss. Yet most of us have a vague idea of what might be to be the best version of yourself. A general picture that as we grow – grows with us. An ever lasting, elastic vision. So the feeling that we are really, truly the best doesn’t come true for most of us. Yet that doesn’t mean we have to resign to never being the best version we can be. It just means changing your expecation of yourself. Try not to aim for perfect, but aim for good enough. Here is why:
Perfect is an end state, an ideal what may be perceived as such for some but not for others. A self-defined ideal that carries a lot of subjectivity with it. First of all – there is no point in striving for an end state. Life is ever flowing and ever changing, there is no reason to stop working on yourself and working on your life – adjusting what you can expect from yourself in the difference circumstances thrown at you. It would be a dull life if there was only one utlimate goal.
Perfect is not realistic. Remove it from your vocabolary or change the definition completely. Sometimes you just cant be perfect because life has so many external factors that are out of your control. Say you think a perfect day is sunny – but its raining. Just a far reached metaphor – but there are so many things that can contribute to your mood and your circumstances – for example if you are hungry or just ate. You don’t exist of just one emotion, or one need, you are a multitude of
Perfect isn’t necessary. Even the pope slaps a fan’s hand sometimes. You appologize, you move on, you are still the pope. I once read a theory that if you give 80% at work or 100% – no one will notice the difference. Give it a go. I felt I always had to give 150, when I changed to 100%, I became a better employee because I was more rested to keep an eye on mistakes. Giving everything of you doesn’t mean giving the best of you.
So replace perfect with good enough. Try it on for size and see how it feels. I think aiming for good enough – will make you the best version of yourself.