Making mistakes seems almost too easy sometimes. So easy that sometimes we don’t even notice we are making them. We let a comment slip that might hurt someone, we get in stressed out situations and let our anger out on people that don’t deserve it. Sometimes things feel like they are so out of our control we lose control of our composure and make a mistake. Even when we don’t lose our composure sometimes we feel we are doing the right thing and only notice later that the effects it has on people is not what we intended.
Making mistakes is human. Every living creature on this earth makes mistakes. So why is it so hard to admit to ourselves when we make one? Why is it so hard to come to terms with the fact that we are flawed, bound to hurt someone that we don’t want to hurt?
We don’t want to be flawed. We want to feel like we are always the best version of ourselves, we don’t want to be punished for being wrong. It is so hard to admit to yourself that every day you try to be your best and then at times you are not. You misbehaved. As a child if you misbehaved you were punished. You did something and a negative consequence followed. We have engraved it in our brains that now when we make a mistake and we don’t have someone else to punish us, we punish ourselves. We feel a negative consequence. Often its this negative feeling, combined with the thought that we should have known better and done better, that makes us avoid accepting the fact that we made a mistake.
Isn’t life easier if you can just go through it without ever admitting to making a mistake and never feeling bad? If everyone else had to admit defeat to being human and we could go around knowing we are always the best version of ourselves, now doesn’t that sound relaxing? No negative feelings such as guilt or shame. Sounds like a perfect life and to be honest, one that will never be.
Instead we should grow from punishment – thanks to maturity we should learn that you have been punished enough for being human. For making mistakes. You should learn that feeling guilt should only be used to help yourself grow into a better person. It is only useful if it is a fuel for yourself to be better and perhaps reduce the amount of some of your mistakes. it should not be a blocker for you to avoid it even more in your life. Learn to love to say sorry. Learn to move from guilt and move instead into growth. Start by admitted you are flawed.